KC Story Alerts!
by K.C Lanton
Summary: I got sick of having to look through stories to find something good. So now I'm going to post lists of the best stories out there using categories. FULL SUMMARY inside. THIS IS NOT A STORY. Rated T becaue I like that letter!
1. Chapter 1

**Hello FanFictioners! I'm KC! (Obviously.) So basically, I got sick of having to sift through stories to actually find a good one. So, I'm going to **

**start posting lists of really really good stories, kind of giving the authors an award, pretty much, for not sucking. I'm going to try to post a **

**new list every week, and hopefully stay more dedicated to this than my other stories. First, I'll explain how I'm going to do this. I'm going to **

**start with a category for the week. Then I'm going to list a good story that fits that category and the author. Next will be a quick synopsis **

**and excerpt from the story. And at the end of each month I'm going to list the Best All-Around Stories, based on popularity, not just the content like everything else will be. The very first category will be HUMOR! All right let's get this started!**

**Humor**

* * *

**How to End a Conversation by XXForrestStarXX.**

**How to End a Conversation is basically about the OC, Forrest, getting herself out of compromising situations. From getting out of trouble to **

**distracting Nudge, Forrest comes up with unique and hilarious ideas on "How to End a Conversation." (Hence the title.)**

_ ~Start an argument that's off topic and makes no sense_

_I was playing with Angel and Nudge in the __living room__. I had just come back from Fang's room._

_"What did you do?" Nudge asked me. I was surprised she said so little. Probably because it's really early in the morning._

_"Nothing," I said innocently. Angel must have read my mind about what I did because she burst out laughing._

_She stopped, "Fang's just woke up."_

_I just kept watching the TV. and then I saw him __enter__ the room._

_"Forrest, why did you pour glitter all over me and change the password on my laptop!"_

_I gasped and clutched my heart dramatically."How dare you accuse me off eating Iggy's taco!"_

_He looked confused," Iggy didn't even eat tacos."_

_"That doesn't mean it can't rain waffles!"_

_"What are you talking about?"_

_"Stop speaking in a language I don't __understand__!"_

_"I'm speaking English!"_

_"What did you say about my mother?"_

_"I didn't say anything about your mother!"_

_"Why are you so mean to me!"_

_"What did I do!"_

"_STOP CONFUSING ME!" Then I stormed out of the room._

_After a few seconds I walked back in, and sat down again to watch TV. Fang shook his head and went back to his room._

That was Chapter 3 from "How to End a Conversation!

* * *

**Next is Another Form of the Avian Bird Flu by St. Fang of Boredom.**

**So while Max and the gang are staying at Dr.M's, Fang gets sick. Bossy, and delirious on drugs, Fang is now being waited on hand and foot **

**by everyone else. (Much to their demise.) This hilarious story is about Fang getting two new imaginary friends, having Iggy's son named Justin, and getting high on "Night Quills."**

"_Whoa!" The bottles and boxes came pouring out of that thing at me. I hoped nobody had heard the noise. What the heck do they use all this stuff for? Was Dr. Martinez secretly running some kind of prescription drug cartel? I shook my head. Another random thought. I needed sleep meds!_

_I began sifting through the stuff. I found the typical Tylenol, Allergy stuff, some eye drops. There was a spray for sore throats, loads of vitamins, and a tube of sunscreen. I found some stuff I didn't recognize. What the heck was Midol, anyway? That's when I came across something helpful._

_Nyquil._

_I heard this stuff could knock people out in minutes. I quickly stuffed everything else back in the cabinet and shut the door before it could all fall out again._

_I opened up the bottle, since it hadn't been used yet. I noticed it had words all over it, probably directions, but, as tired as I was, it looked like a bunch of gibberish. I just stared at the open bottle for a minute. How much of this am I supposed to take? Well, it had a little cup thingy with it, but I wasn't sure how many of those I was supposed to have. So, I started trying to count up the days that I hadn't gotten sleep._

_"Let's see, tonight, obviously, yesterday, ummmm...the day before. That's three. The day before that...Oh, the day of the...shot. Five. The day before that. The day Iggy got sick. The day before that...I think. Ok, so that's, like, eight._

_I stared at the bottle again. All this dosage stuff was too confusing for this time of night. I gave the stuff a sniff. Ugh. I'd want to get this stuff down fast, or I might gag it up._

_So I just shrugged, put the bottle to my lips, and drank about, oh, say..._

_Half._

_Max's POV_

_"Max, why don't you go to bed?" Mom asked me._

_I stifled a yawn. "Aw, come on! How will I ever know how the movie it ends?"_

_"The dog dies."_

_"Oh, sure, thanks for ruining it for me." I yawned again. "Yeah, maybe I-"_

_I heard a noise in the hallway, sounded like someone knocked over Mom's plant. I looked around the couch, trying to see anything in the dark. Suddenly, I heard Fang's voice._

_"Hey, is my room that way? Oh, no it's not!" He started giggling._

_"Fang?" I called. "You ok?"_

_Fang came around the corner, holding onto the wall to keep him up. "Hey, Max! Maxy! Maxeemum!"_

_"Uh. Fang? What are you doing up?" Mom asked._

_He shakingly pointed a finger at her. "What are __you__ doing up?"_

_Mom got up and I followed. "Fang, are you alright?" Mom asked, putting a hand on his forehead._

_He batted it away. "I'm fine. Final. Final fin fine." He started giggling again._

_"Sure, Fang, and I'm Marilyn Monroe." I said. I turned to Mom. "Does he have a fever?"_

_She shook her head. "No, but may-"_

_"You're as pretty as Moneryn Manlow. Marylow Monryn. That girl." Fang, said, jumping in front of me. "Prettier."_

_"Uhhh...Thanks, Fang." I put my hand to his head. "You're right, Mom, no fever."_

_Fang stuck his hand on my head, nearly covering my eyes. "Do __you__ have a fever? Nope, you're just hot." He started laughing._

_I pulled his hand off of my head. "Ok, Fang, cut it out."_

_"Hey! Hey, Dr. M! You got a spade?"_

_Mom raised an eyebrow. "No..."_

_"Good." Fang practically jumped on me, trying to give me a hug. "Ok, Max, she doesn't have a spade. My room or hers?"_

_WTF? I quickly tried to pry him off of me. "Fang, what the heck has gotten into you?"_

_"Night Quills."_

_I stared. "Huh?"_

_"Night Quills!" He started laughing again. "Hey, Max, you and me and the cops should go yelling and see if we can wake up the Flock before the neighbors show up. Bring Spiffy and Pooky!" He started running for the door._

_Mom and I grabbed him. "Fang, you need to calm down and take a seat for a minute." Mom said, trying to drag him over to the couch._

_"But I don'wannago." Fang whined, slurring his words a bit. "I don't wanna seat down and calm for a minute."_

_"Do you think he's sick, even without the fever?" I asked, trying to help Mom drag him over. "Maybe he's just starting to catch Iggy's chickenpox?"_

_Before Mom could answer, Fang cut in again. "Chickenpox! Iggy ate the chicken's pox!"_

_"Fang, please-"_

_"But what about Justin? Oh, I'm such a dadbeat dead!" Before either of us could think, he broke away and ran down the hall, flinging the door to Iggy's room open._

_Oh, great._

_Iggy's POV_

_So, I had just barely started to fall asleep, after spending the majority of the night telling myself not to itch while trying to ignore the disgusting smell of the anti-itch creme, when my door flew open._

_"Hey, what's-" I started to say, but then was pounced on by something very large and heavy._

_"Iggy! Spit out the chicken's pox!"_

_"Fang?" I asked, confused. "What are you-"_

_"I'm sorry I'm a beatdad dead. I'll try to get Justy out of the Orphan Russianage."_

_Ok..."Fang, are you feeling alright?" Was I having another weird dream?_

_"Iggy! You're so caring! I lovest you!" Suddenly, I was being hugged. Crushed, really._

_"Ow, Fang...le' go..."_

_"Fang!" I heard Max yell by the door. I heard Dr. Martinez's footsteps close behind hers._

_Fang let out the most girlish shriek I'd ever heard from a guy's mouth. "Maxy! It's not what you think!" He finally let go of me, bursting into laughter._

_"Fang?" I asked, rubbing my arms where he had squeezed them. "What are you, drunk?"_

_"I swear to drunk I'm not God!" He yelled out, right before bursting into laughter again._

_"Guys..." I said to Max and Dr. M. "What's up with him?"_

_"No clue, Igs." Dr. Martinez answered._

_"Well, whatever he's on, I want some." I joked. "Now, get him out of here in case he's got something contagious. I have enough problems."_

_I heard Max start to approach the bed, but not in time to stop Fang from laughing himself right off of it._

_"Max! I've fallen and I can't get up!" Fang yelled from the floor. The kid was still laughing, for crying out loud!_

_I heard Max come over and pull him to his feet. "Come on, Fang. Let's go to bed."_

_"Sorry, Iggy. I've got to go." Fang said. "Max wants me in bed."_

_I heard Max groan. I laughed. "Yeah, Max, you have fun with that."_

_"What's going on?" I heard a sleepy, sounding Angel call from the door._

_"Angel!" Fang yelled. "Go wake up the cops and tell them to go after the crazy neighbors! Bring cheese and-" His voice was stifled by what I guess must've been Max's hand._

_"It's alright, Angel." Dr. M called._

_"Hey, I'll bring Fang to bed." Max said. "You can go take care of Angel, Mom."_

_"Alright, if you can handle him."_

_"I've got him."_

_I rolled over, yawning. "And I'll stay here and hold down the fort. Night, all."_

_As they left the room, I heard Fang say, "Max, let's bed to go 'cause spade Martinez doesn't have a doctor."_

_Yeah, __so__ not dealing with that._

_Max's POV_

_I dragged Fang into his room, shutting the door behind us in hopes it might prevent him from trying to escape._

_"Come on, Fang, how about you lay down on the-"_

_He grabbed me in another hug. "Ok, lay down on the bed." He pulled me down onto the bed with him. "Max, we're in bed!"_

_I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, I noticed." I struggled out of his grip. "Fang, you need to go to sleep."_

_"But I don't wanna sleep..." Then, he kissed me. Or, he tried to. He had his lips on mine for about fifteen seconds before I pushed him away. Kissing Loopy-Fang was not the same as kissing Normal-Fang. Plus, his mouth tasted funny._

_"Fang, stop it."_

_"Max!" He said, sitting up. "I love you."_

_"I know, Fang."_

_He stretched his arms out wide. "I love you __this__ much!"_

_Oh, __this__ sounded familiar..._

_"I love you more than cheese. And other foods." He thought for a second. "And Iggy. I don't even really love Iggy, except as, like, a sister or something. A siblingy thing. I don't know where Justin came from."_

_"That's...nice, Fang." A sister? Oh, I've got to tell Iggy that one!_

_"But, I love you, anyways." He yawned. "Let's have kids someday."_

_Don't scream, Max, don't scream! "Heh, heh, y-yeah, Fang. Someday..."_

_"Yeah, we'll name one Michael. I like that name. We'll call him Mikey. Yeah..." He slowly lowered himself onto the bed, muttering. "Spiffy can be his Godfather..."_

_"Sure, Fang." I said, stroking his hair. "Whatever you want."_

_"Mmmmhhh...Love ya, Max."_

_"I love you, too, Fang. Even if you are on something."_

_I had no response that time. His breathing evened out, he was lying still, in perfect silence. Finally, asleep._

_Just as I was pulling the blankets over him, Mom opened the door. "Max?"_

_"Shhh. Sleeping beauty just dozed off."_

_She smiled. "Ahhh, that makes sense."_

_I looked up at her. "What do you mean?"_

_"I found __this__ in the sink in the bathroom." She said, holding up a bottle. "It's his Night Quills."_

_"What?"_

_She turned the bottle around to show the front label._

_"Oh, Nyquil."_

Taken from Chapter 29: Night Quills.

* * *

**Fang Venom Must Die! By The Black Rose 1995.**

**This story is based off the movie John Tucker Must Die. Nudge ,Bridget, and Ella all discover that Fang is cheating on them all, so for sweet **

**revenge they get Max, the new girl, to help them. They make Fang fall for Max so they can rip his heart out. But what happens when Max **

**falls for him too?**

_"Good. Now just as a warning, Fang is probably going to kiss you ok? You have kissed a boy before right?" Ella asked me._

_"Yes, I have. Don't you dare tell my brother." I told her. She smiled at this but then her eyes went wide and she jumped into the car while closing the door behind her._

_"What are you doing?" I asked her as she tried to crawl into the back seat._

_"Fang's coming!" she whispered to me. Sure enough, Fang opened the driver's door three seconds later._

_"Hey!" I said loudly, trying to cover up the sounds of Ella trying to fit half under the driver's seat and hidden from his view._

_"Hey." he said as he started the car and backed out of the parking lot._

_The rest of the ride was in silence. That is until I saw Ella's hand waving at me. I turned my head a bit to see what was wrong. Ella then held up a bright pink bra._

_My eyes widened and I bit my lip to stop from laughing._

_"What's so funny?" Fang asked me._

_I smirked at him and took the bra from Ella._

_"I didn't know you liked pink so much Fang." I teased him as I showed him the bra._

_"Umm, about that- …..You see-… I thought that-….. Umm." Fang tried, unsuccessfully to explain. The look on his face was priceless and I saw that his face turned a light pink under his tan._

_"Are- are you blushing Fang?" I asked him in disbelief. His eyes widened and he tried to hide his face from me._

_I laughed at his childish actions._

_"Oh, heaven forbid that Fang Venom doesn't look like the big macho man, player that he is." I teased him. He looked at me like I was crazy but luckily he pulled into my driveway then._

_I looked at Ella and saw her moving her hands as she tried to tell me something. __Get Fang out!_

_"Umm, walk me to the door?" I asked him with a smile on my face._

_"Sure." he told me. He got out of the car and I set Ella a __'Get the HECK out!' __look that she nodded to._

_I walked the short distance to my door and looked back to see Ella standing behind the car watching us._

_"So I guess I'll see you at school tomorrow." I said to Fang._

_"Yeah, umm. I had fun tonight. A lot more then I usually do." Fang told me as he rubbed the back of his head. I raised an eyebrow at him and smirked._

_"Do I need to mention the pink bra again?" I asked him._

That was from Chapter 9: A Date and the Perfect Marshmallow.

* * *

**I hope everyone enjoys these stories as much as I did. Please review to tell me your thoughts on these stories, or submit a story and I'll **

**take a look at it. I also am up for any category ideas or and plain ideas in general. Please review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N**

**I apologize for the length of time it has taken me to update. For reasons I will not take to the public, I cannot update weekly as first promised. My apologies. I've decided to change the format for these updates. I'm going to list different categories with each story, instead of every chapter having the same category. I hope this way is easier.**

* * *

The first story I've picked out is

**Daddy's Home by the Girl with the Silly Smile. **

While Daddy's Home is kind of a cliché, it's one of the very few out there worth reading. It's the usual Max gets abused, falls for Fang, etc. etc., but with an awesome twist. I really do believe it's worth reading, and it's on my favorites list for sure. In this case cliché is a _very_ good thing. Here is the first chapter.

_It all started when I was six years old. My dad left. I didn't know why, but I'd blamed myself. My step-mom, Stephanie, told me not to blame myself. But I did. I was all alone in a world of nothingness. Even though I was surrounded by a family that loved me. My brother Ari and his twin Angel. I also had a step-sister named Monique, and a step-brother named Gabe._

_Without my father, I was nothing. I mean, Ari and Angel were my little siblings, but I still felt alone._

_Stephanie was normally nice, but after my dad left, she'd started to drink. And once that happened… she'd become, well, abusive. But only toward me. Because I was the oldest._

_"No! Stephanie! Don't!" I would yell, but she wouldn't listen._

_She would just hit me as hard as she could._

_But now… ten years later, everything is backwards._

_Gabe and Monique got put into foster care because Stephanie was an unsuitable mother._

_I thank the neighbors for hearing my screams._

_Ari and Angel were adopted by my grandmother a few years ago._

_Now it's just me and Stephanie. And to be honest, I'm scared for my life._

_I can't even count how many bruises I have because of her._

_She is truly, a horrible woman._

_I'd always hoped my dad would come home and take me away from her, but it's been ten years, so I doubt he'll be back._

That was the first chapter of Daddy's Home.

* * *

The next story I've chosen is one of my ALL TIME FAVORITES and is also (coincidentally) in the drama category. I have chosen _**Firefighter: The Chiefs Daughter by Fangrules. **_This story is amazing with loveable OC's and a great storyline. It has an awesome but realistic romance, and I think _**Fangrules portrays**_ Max and Fang very well. Here is a clip.

_Screams filled the air as yet another section of the school collapsed, I watched mortified as the last of the pre-schoolers were brought out, I scanned them quickly, staring into each face but coming up empty. __She's still in there!__ I mentally screamed, I might have voiced it but I don't know all I can remember is being restrained by fire-fighters._

_"NO! Let me go! My sister's in there!" I screamed at the man holding me._

_"It's too dangerous for us to send anyone in Max, I'm sorry." He calmly spoke like I could just get over it!_

_"Get out of the way!" shrieked punching him straight in the chin. With a gasp he released me. Before anyone could touch me I bolted straight for the fire. Heat. That is all I can really remember when I walked into the burning school, the flames licked at my skin hungrily burning my hair and causing my eyes to water. I walked in further yelling my sister's name and then it went dark._

_Fang's P.O.V._

_"Chief!" Iggy yelled running towards us, his helmet under his arm. He skids to a halt in front of Chief Batchelder who had been evacuating the remaining kids with my help. Instantly he turned to Iggy._

_"What is it Ig?" he asked putting a hand on his shoulder while he tried to catch his breath._

_"Max, she-she got in." He rasped his eyes wide. __The chief's daughter!__ I yelled at myself. __How the hell did she get passed the guards?__ Just as I thought it the chief screamed it at Iggy._

_"How the hell!" I had never heard his voice go so high even though I had only just been transferred._

_"She beat up Grady, said something about her sister still being in the school." Iggy puffed._

_"She doesn't have a sister!" the Chief fumed._

_"We can't find her Chief." Iggy informed him grimly._

_"I will." I quickly said before shooting off towards the fire. I could hear the yells of protest coming from the chief who released a string of profanities and ordered me to come back. Grady tried to catch me but missed by inches, Iggy was right on my tail trying to catch up. I entered the building only to be hit from a blast as one of the gas tanks exploding. I pushed through the fire, pulling my mask down. The ceiling had half collapsed and rubble covered almost the entire floor, locker doors were torn off, their contents burning. A tremor hit knocking me off my feet. I searched everywhere until I noticed a dog tag lying on a heap of rubble. I picked it up._

_MAX RIDE__._

_Was scrawled across it and I instantly dropped to my knees throwing pieces of the ceiling to the side. I noticed her hand balled into a fist, clutching something desperately. I managed to open her tight fingers to find a crumpled picture. I looked at it and found a small blonde haired girl she had bright blue eyes and her hair lay in curls on her shoulders. Max knelt besides her, hugging her and behind them a large banner took up the door of the school._

_"__Big sister project__."_

_So she didn't mean her blood sister__. I shoved the picture in my pocket and continued to sig her out. She was in pretty deep but I managed to dig her out rather fast. I ripped my helmet and mask off slipping them over her head, I picked her up bridal style just as another tank blew .Holding her to me in a lame attempt to protect her from the blaze that was now consuming the whole school I made my way through the fire. The smoke was now so thick I could barely see a foot in front of me, not to mention the breathing difficulties I was having but I pushed through, there was no use in coming in here in the first place if I was just going to let her die. I didn't even notice I had stumbled out the building until I heard the roaring of sirens and the yells of my co-workers. Max was ripped from my arms and taken to a stretcher while I was hauled up by Iggy and Matthew. They half carried me to a stretcher which I refused to get on. Then the Chief came and screamed so loud I'm sure I went deaf for an instant._

_"What the hell were you thinking Marks!" he was throwing his arms up and pacing around in front of me. I just smirked at him as an E.M.T. tried to get me to lie on the stretcher._

_"You're welcome." I mumbled to him finally giving in to the constant begs of the E.M.T's after I almost coughed myself from smoke inhalation. He froze instantly as I was grudgingly lifted into the ambulance._

_"She's ok?" he whispered to me. I just nodded and watched as tears came to his eyes. "Thank you." He checked out before leaving me with Iggy who climbed in the ambulance and had a good old' laugh at me._

_"Shut it." I mumbled through the oxygen mask they were making me wear._

_"Aw Fangy-poo, don't you feel like such a hero? Saving the chiefs daughter, someone's a serious suck up." To which he got a punch in the gut._

* * *

That was the first chapter of Firefighter: The Chiefs Daughter.

The third story for today is The Girl with the Burned on Wings by deathtobieber. (For the record I have been brainwashed into becoming a Bieber fan after I saw the movie…just saying.) First of is the title not freaking amazing for some reason I even fell in love with the title. Deathtobieber's writing made me like it even more, it was amazing! (Yes, it even gets two exclamation points.) It's another one of my clichés. I swear not all of my all of my stories will be clichés this is just going through my list. Here is a part of the first chapter. This category is Hurt/Comfort and as always a romance.

_**The boys rushed into the room and stopped when they saw my back.**_

_**Flashback**_

_**I ran down the stairs. A loud thump sounded and I hoped Dad was still asleep. He wasn't. Not anymore. He rushed out of his room a yelled, "Max! What are you doing making all that noise!"**_

_**"I'm sorry!" I cried. **_

_**"Stop going up and down the stairs!"**_

_**"I don't have to listen to you! You don't own me!"**_

_**With that, he back handed me. He picked me up by my hair and dragged me to the living room, where there was a fire place. He threw me to the ground and ripped the back of my shirt open. He unhooked my bra, and placed something in the fireplace. I realized it was a branding iron. **_

_**"No, Daddy! Don't!" I yelled through my tears. "Please!"**_

_**"This'll teach you who you belong to," he said and pressed the brander to my back. I cried out in pain, hoping I would faint from the pain. But nooooo! My life was too hard for that. My back was on fire. I eventually did faint from the pain, but right when he was done marking m for life. **_

_**Two weeks later, he was in prison and I was in foster care. That was the last time I cried.**_

* * *

Okay someone pm-ed me an idea that I should have immediately turned down…but did not. _They basically offered that I should also include one really bad story and trash it_. It's horrible, I know, but it would bring a lot of controversy and publicity to this story. So I'll try it this once… my first story to ever trash is _**Fighting to Protect**_… by yours truly _**K.C. Lanton**_. It sucks, and trust me I know. I have many times thought about deleting from Fan Fiction but what kind of author are you if can't trash your own story? So DO NOT read my story Fighting to Protect, every time I look at it I grimace.

So tell me what you think about everything also please give me recommendations and your opinions on the story _I_ recommend. What should I do with the being mean? YOU tell ME, please review or pm me! Bye have a nice day! (Enter cheesy smile).


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